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PW Connect (www.pastorswives.com) is the sister blog of Pastors' Wives Thriving in the Fishbowl's website & message board. We support, encourage, and nurture ministry wives. Our contributors have experienced the fishbowl of ministry life firsthand, and we're here to come alongside you in all the joys and tears.

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Monday, September 26, 2016

Thanks, I Needed That


At a city wide pastor and wives event we were seated at a table with another couple whom we have known for some time.  Everyone knows this couple. When most think of this couple, I think words such as "loud" and maybe even "obnoxious" come to mind. This couple loves the Lord but are known for sharing their opinions freely with much authority.

On the way home I asked my hubby,  " I wonder if I there are any ways that I appear to others in a different way than I see myself?”

It didn't take long to find out.

We attended a reunion of Christians we met in the 70s during the "Jesus Coffee House" era.  It was wonderful to see these people, many of whom still serve the Lord.  As I interacted with someone I've known for years, a remark was made to me that took me aback. Basically the person told me he didn't think I liked him.

I was shocked. Of course I like him. In fact, I admire him and his ministry. I was hurt by his remark to me. I asked him, with admittedly some defensiveness, to explain what he meant and he told me.

I was ready to tell him that he misunderstood me and took my actions the wrong way when my earlier prayer came to mind. Could this be the answer? Could God be showing me how I can look to others?

I left the reunion feeling a little bruised, but the more I pondered it  and tried to see it through his eyes, the more I began to realize that my actions could easily be interpreted as he apparently had interpreted them, even though I didn't mean them in a negative way.

Years ago, we used to hear about “The Reproofs of Life."  I don’t hear that phrase used anymore, but what it means is this:  We learn from difficult things that life teaches us.  Not watching where we are going and falling down is a “reproof of life."  Getting caught for stealing something is a “reproof of life."  

Being told you hurt someone can be a “reproof of life."

Proverbs 15:31 teaches this principle “He whose ear listens to the life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.”

I emailed my old friend and thanked him sincerely for his remark to me.  It was a reproof that opened my eyes to a way I appeared to others that I was not aware of.  I began to think about how I can come across to others.from their perspective.



It’s easy to miss the reproofs of life.  It’s easy to think “Boy is he touchy, I was just kidding," or  “Of course I didn’t mean it that way, he took it the wrong way."

As PW’s, our actions are scrutinized--and in many cases, unfairly. But we can grow as women and Christians if we don’t simply write off the remarks of others as unfair.

Perhaps there is a grain of truth in the observations of others that we can learn from.

Ask ourselves:  how did I look from their eyes?  How did this sound to their ears? Even though I had good motives, from their perspective, could it look different?

My friend didn’t know he was giving me “life giving reproof” with his remark, but by looking at our interaction from his eyes, I gained some fresh new perspective and plan to approach people in a slightly different way in the future, more mindful of how I come across to others.

About the Author:

Deb Harrold has been a Christ follower since 1972. She is a pastor's wife, mother, grandmother, nurse, and ladies Bible teacher. You can connect with Deb at her blog, http://themistyflats.blogspot.com/



Sunday, September 25, 2016

Reviving Our PastorsWives Ministry Part 2: The PW Blog

Last week we successfully revived our message board for pastors' wives. I was thrilled to literally see the board coming back to life in the forum statistics -- like a heart beat on a monitor!

I also hinted at more to come. And today, it's time to announce phase two:

If you saw our call for writers or have connected with us on social media, you may already know that we're taking the PastorsWives.Com blog up a notch, with a team of contributors posting regularly to encourage and support ministry wives.


I'm excited to announce our first official post from that team is scheduled for this week -- 

Tuesday Sept. 27th, to be exact. 

Be sure to follow us by e-mail so that you don't miss a post, or subscribe to our newsletter for a monthly digest of all posts.

More about Tuesday's post in a second, but first a very special thanks to...

Leigh Powers -- Leigh blogs about faith, life, and kingdom living at My Life, His Story. Her e-book, How Do I Forgive? -- offered to subscribers of her personal blog, is a blessing to read.

Last summer, as we discussed revitalizing our pastors' wife message board; Leigh approached me, offering to help recruit/organize writers and schedule/publicize their posts. That's what I've wanted for this blog all along, and so I'm beyond thrilled to have her come alongside. What a blessing she is!

And now back to this week's featured author...

We'll be hearing from Deb Harrold. She is a pastor's wife, mother, grandmother, nurse, and ladies Bible teacher. For a preview of the wisdom she'll share with us on Tuesday, you can visit her blog, Out of the Misty Flats.


Hope to see you on the message board today, and hope to see you back here on the blog this Tuesday!

 (Oh, and if you're having trouble getting in to the pastor's wife forum, please check your e-mail (including the spam folder) for a message with more information. And if you've already been approved, be sure that you're logging in to see all the posts -- some have had trouble finding the link to log-in.

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Sunday, September 18, 2016

It's Time to Re-Launch our PastorsWives Ministry!


  The day has come! September 19th has been circled on our calendars for months. It's finally here, and we are over-the-moon excited!

For what, you might ask? Well, for many, many years there had been this really neat message board and website for pastors' wives. How exciting it was over the years as one by one we each found it. Wow! Someone who knows me. Someone who gets me!

For a while, it thrived. Then it ebbed and flowed. We lost members when the software had a necessary but confusing upgrade. Others were widowed, and still others left vocational ministry. Life happened. Facebook happened. But through it all, some of us have always been there ready to lend a shoulder or a listening ear.

Until one day in early June someone asked, "Where is everybody?"

So we prayed. We talked. And we decided that despite all other social media, our message forum for pastors' wives is still a valuable ministry.

So we prayed some more and put our heads together. We decided on a re-launch week (September 19th-26th).

I cleaned, organized, and simplified. I paid to make the forum ad-free. We decided that if everyone who would love to see our message board thrive again would show up at the same time with things to discuss, we'd have the energy and critical mass to get things going again.

So, here we are. Showing up! Won't you join us? 


To register, use the above link or click here.

And please, connect with us. The message board re-launch is just the beginning!



Monday, September 12, 2016

Retreats and Conferences for PastorsWives

As we are getting ready to re-launch our pastors' wives ministry, I have compiled a list of retreats and conferences that are geared specifically for pastors' wives. Most of them are in the United States. Many of them are happening very soon! Perhaps there's one in your area?


BethNuah offers retreats at no cost for ministers’ wives. http://bethnuahministries.com/

Psalm One Ministries -- in 2016, Psalm One hosted retreats in Ohio & Wisconsin during February, and will host pastors' wives Sept. 30th-Oct 2nd in Pennsylvania.

Just Between Us - Women's Conference October 4th-6th, 2016 in Westboro, Wisconsin. Just Between Us has historically served pastors' wives and women in ministry.

Leading and Loving It -- Re:treat in Las Vegas, Nevada October 25-27th, 2016 for pastors' wives and women in ministry.


The Confidante for Pastors' Wives retreat, scheduled for April 28-30, 2017 in Orlando, Florida.



Photo from Fairhaven Ministries.
Pastors' Wives Retreat September 15-17, 2016 at Fairhaven Ministries in the Blue Ridge Mountains of East Tennessee.

Call 423-772-4269 for details or e-mail info.fairhavenministries@gmail.com -- it may be too late for this year, but it's not too early to get on their mailing list for next year.


Sandy Cove Ministries Calendar Sandy Cove Ministries in Maryland has previously held a Pastors' Wives Connection. Currently their calendar has mini-sabbaticals available.

Lois Evans Video archive from Lois Evans, who has previously hosted a First Lady Conference in Dallas, Texas.

If you know of a pastor's wife conference that's not listed, including those not in the U.S., please leave a comment and I will update this post with your information.

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